The Girl's Guide to DC
Issue 61: 50 First Networking Dates
Welcome back to The Girl’s Guide to DC! If you missed the most recent issue, find it here.
I want this newsletter to be about you, the ladies of DC, so send me your healthy dinner recipes and bad date stories by replying to this email.
Find me on Instagram and Twitter so you don’t miss anything GGDC.
Ask Evie
Submit your questions to Ask Evie anonymously via this form.
Q: I got network-y drinks with a male contact who could be helpful to me professionally. After the drinks he messaged me, "I dunno if you would find this weird but we should grab dinner sometime."
Agh! How do you maintain a line of contact professionally without accepting an invitation to what sounds like a date? - Not Interested Like That
A: Oh, the joys of being a woman in the workplace. I understand that you and this gentleman are not coworkers, but you’ll probably keep running into each other because of your work.
Washingtonians talk about how DC has a terrible dating scene because of the transience, the male-to-female ratio, and the political divide — but honestly, the biggest buzzkill is the fact that all of our jobs are interconnected.
Some people meet their spouses at work — while others have ill-fated office romances that leave them applying to new jobs to get the heck out of there. DC daters often end up hoping a relationship works out just because there’s always a risk your ex-boyfriend will turn up as your new coworker.
Your professional “male contact” seems to understand he’s taking a risk by proposing dinner. Unfortunately, he’s doing it in a way that makes it tricky for you to respond — he’s not explicitly asking you on a date, but you are totally correct to interpret it that way.
You’ll have to spell things out for your contact, even if you’re afraid he’ll get defensive or deny that he asked you on a date in the first place. I would respond with a message like, “I like to keep my one-on-one meetings to coffee or drinks! I really value our professional relationship — thanks for the kind offer.”
It’s a slightly awkward message to send, but if he is a good guy, he’ll get the message loud and clear and probably respond with something sheepish about how it’s no problem at all. Unless he keeps pushing you for a date, he’s not doing anything wrong.
If his response is sulky or terse, then you dodged a bullet both professionally and romantically. There’s no professional contact who’s worth accepting a date you don’t want to go on. And anyone who thinks they’re owed a date probably thinks they’re owed a little too much in a professional relationship, too.
Assuming he is understanding that you don’t want to get dinner one-on-one, you can try to resume your professional relationship as before. After all, he casually suggested a date — he didn’t propose marriage. But don’t be surprised or offended if he seems to fade away. People don’t exactly like being reminded of rejection.
Some Washingtonians claim coffee is professional, while drinks or dinner are personal, but real life situations often aren’t cut and dried. So, was there any way to avoid this situation in the first place? Probably not, but now you can decide if going forward you’d prefer to avoid getting drinks with men you’re not interested in. DC is a schmoozing and boozing place, but the sooner you learn that people often blur the lines between personal and professional, the sooner you can set boundaries that work for you. I promise that saying no to one-on-one drinks with someone won’t set back your career. It might even save you from some awkward situations.
Interview with Erin Getz
This week, I’m excited to introduce you to Erin Getz, a Connecticut native who now calls the DMV home! Connect with Erin on Twitter and Instagram.
What do you love about your neighborhood?
I live in the Ballston neighborhood of Arlington. My favorite part of living in Ballston is that the majority of my closest friends live here too, making them walking distance from my apartment. It’s like college all over again, but better!
It’s also such a fun little neighborhood and over the past three-plus years that I’ve lived here, so many new restaurants, coffee shops, and businesses have opened up that have really made the neighborhood an exciting place to be. Also there is such easy access to great trails for running or biking or whatever you're into!
What does your life look like right now?
Much of my life right now is devoted to my role at the March for Life as the Director of the State March Program! It’s such a blast getting to both work on the pro-life issue and state-level advocacy — two of my passions coming together in a dream role!
Outside of work, I’ll be beginning a two-year program in September with Encounter Ministries’ School of Healing. It’s all about equipping and activating Catholics to be active disciples, demonstrating the love of God through the Holy Spirit. I went to their conference back in December in Grand Rapids, MI, and it was life-changing. I can’t wait to dive deeper through this program!
What would you tell a woman your age who's considering moving to DC?
Do it. Do it. Do it.
1.) It’s the most lively, engaged, and young Catholic community I’ve ever seen, and my faith has grown so much while living here.
2.) There are so many ways to spend your free time, no matter what you’re interested in! Are you a museum go-er? A hiker? A foodie? A live music lover? You’re in for the best time of your life.
3.) If you’re not sure what you want to do with your career — DC is the best place to be! There are so many industries and opportunities to learn and network right at your fingertips. Go to those happy hour events. Get coffee with someone in your dream role to learn more. Explore programs and opportunities to grow your skills for that job you want.
What's the biggest lesson you've learned in your career?
Go for the dream job! Take the leap of faith. I switched from working in government affairs at a trade association to a nonprofit organization in the pro-life movement, which was certainly a scary jump. I learned so much in my previous role and had a great team, but I knew my heart wanted to give my all to the pro-life movement. When I found a role that both aligned my passion for the pro-life movement and my professional skills of state-level advocacy, I knew I couldn’t let that moment pass. Don’t sell yourself short and don’t let what other people will think of you impact your decision. Best decision I ever made.
What’s one book you think every woman should read?
It’s so hard to pick one!! But alas — I must go with St. Thérèse of Lisieux’s autobiography — Story of a Soul. This book profoundly impacted my life. The fact that by age 24 (when she died) St. Thérèse had so much spiritual wisdom and richness blew me away. She’s one of four female doctors of the church for a reason. Though she was a cloistered nun, she truly has wisdom for every single person packed into those pages. Don’t walk, RUN — and read this book.
What's your hair care routine like? Any favorite products?
Where are my curly girls at?! I do a wash and style about one to two times per week, because for those who have curly hair, you’ll know that it is DRY. Frequent shampooing is the death of curls. I’ve tried just about every product, but I always come back to Ouidad. It’s never steered me wrong. Their leave-in conditioner and gel is the right balance of creamy and light — keeps the hair moisturized without weighing it down with a bunch of products. 10/10 recommend for my curly girls.
The Haps
Thrifting Road Trip, Anyone?
Some people plan their vacations around beautiful views or amazing food — but I could be tempted to plan a vacation around the country’s best thrift stores. Check out this breakdown of the best cities for thrifting in 2022 — DC ranks a respectable 51 out of 200.
It’s not surprising that New York City, the nation’s fashion capital, ranks at number one, and Los Angeles, the home of the red carpet, ranks at number three — but did you expect to see Houston, San Antonio, and San Diego round out the top five? Honestly, I just want to experience a Goodwill Outlet Store where everything’s purchased by the pound — which means I may be taking my next vacation in Indianapolis.
New Restaurant Alert
If you’ve been to Adams Morgan recently, you may have noticed a mysterious pink neon sign and wondered what it could mean. Well, wonder no longer — the building will soon be home to Le Mont Royal, a “French-Canadian disco with wild riffs on bistro fare,” The Washingtonian reports. When it opens this fall, I have a feeling Le Mont Royal will be drawing crowds who are in the mood for something a little different from the rest of the DC scene! You can follow Le Mont Royal on Instagram here.
Where’s the Best Caesar Salad in DC?
DC stands for District of Caesar, right? Well, not quite, but a new Twitter account is searching for the best caesar salad in all of DC — complete with a very thorough rubric. So far, The Hamilton and Lulu’s Winegarden seem to be contenders.
To be honest, I’m a little disappointed I didn’t come up with this idea. My go-to order has been a chicken caesar salad since I was able to chew — and I definitely had a ranking of the best caesar salads in my hometown of Raleigh, NC, back in the day. Thank you, District Caesar, for putting in the work.
Here are a few more links to what I’ve been reading and listening to this week:
Your Favorite American Girl Dolls As TikTok Influencers: The American Girl meme refuses to die. Evie Magazine breaks down what each doll would be doing if she had access to TikTok.
Bright Hearth Podcast - The Closet: Wardrobe, Modesty, & Clothing Our Kids Like We Love Them: I’ve been devouring the Bright Hearth podcast, hosted by husband-and-wife duo Brian and Lexy Sauvé. They have a lot of wisdom about ordering your home (and your life) for the good of your family. But they don’t just have advice for new parents — I found Brian’s dating advice for young women in this episode to be quite the life hack (hint: it has to do with dressing up and casually bringing your suitor a homemade pie).
Bulletin Board
Congrats to MCKENNA and RYAN NEUHAUS, who announced they are expecting Baby #3 in January 2023! Baby Boy will join big sisters RAELEIGH and LILA. Congratulate Mckenna on Instagram.
Today in Microfashion
I can’t believe that in just a few short months I’ll be holding my daughter — and deciding what she wears! Thanks to Kayla Panchak for this adorable “Made in DC” onesie for Baby Solheim — after all, Nick’s and my love story started in DC. It’s definitely a great gift for District parents — you can find the onesie at Shop Made in DC locations or by clicking this link.
